Friday, October 18, 2013

Wretch!

Wretch is closing down.
I am rather sad to know that actually.

All the emotional posts I had there...
All the other blogs I had visited...
All the music I had listened...
will soon be a no more...

Let me move the entries here. At least they will have a new place to live...

~
June 30, 2007


Problems! Problems!

How come there are so many problems recently ar? Aiyo... Duno wad to say lor!

One of my friend... She failed a test for a paper and her family issue a ban for her. She must go straight home after school. And her grandma passed away recently... Another friend of mine... Her grandpa was admitted into hospital... Another friend of mine... Her mother had been scolding her for the weirdest things... Another friend of mine... Her grandma passed away recently... Some of my friends had came down with a flu... Den many are busy over projects projects and more projects.

The above are just some of the problems that came out recently... My grandma was admitted into a hospital. Same goes to my aunt.

Yesterday night, i had a chat with 2 friends of mine... Somehow, we are facing similar problems in some ways... It was a nice chat... For that we hardly talk about all these... Its so personal...
~
June 30, 2007


This post... I wanted to put it into my public blog... But in the end, i still decide not to... So i put it here instead.

Many times after a conflict, many people would be unhappy with one another...

Now, lemme say this... If there is a friend of yours, after quarrelling, the person claims everything to be fine and alright, everything is ok, and are still nice friends by means of anything thru MSN SMS Email and even telephone or snail mail or wadever and he or she is not a petty person... But in person, he or she is still obviously mad at you, by giving you cold shoulders and not talking with you, and not even giving you a look... What will you do?? How will you think?? 

To this particular person... Im going to be straight and blunt... You had said those to me through MSN liao. You had also claim that you are not a petty person. You had also given me the trust to trust back you. But, you had seriously thrown me into great disappointment... Especially after that day after the test, what are you trying to mean when i talk to you, you dun even reply to me and look at me... Only after my continuous bombarding you of the same question, you finally replied, and your answer? Is just a line, said out loud and rudely into the air, not at me. It got worse when i saw you walking out of the lift, what are you trying to say when you saw me, you actually look away and pretended that u had not? As well as on that day when we are in the same class (Dun pretend you dunno the only class we are together now) the coldness you throw towards everyone behind you? Seriously, sometimes when this happens, i seriously wanted to give you a tight slap or to yell at you right at your face. Do you know how much WE hated it? Yes.. Its WE... not me alone. Now im telling you, i had finally understand why you always tell me that you have much friends. I am thinking... maybe its you that do not know to treasure it. Its pretty obvious everyone are fine with it now with you being the only exception. Am i right? Even if others still mind, at least they would smile when i saw them. What about you? So for now, I am not going to do anything unless you take action first. Prove to me! Prove to me that what i said up there are wrong. Prove to me that you are actually okie right now. Tell me! Tell me what are you not satisfied now. Tell me what is in your mind all these while. Explain to me! Explain why are the cold shoulders. Explain why are you behaving in such abhorrent way... So, do not blame me if i start to do the same things you had done to me. And one last thing... Stop pretending... its just so so fake. If you want to lie, I will start lying together with you. If you pretend, I will start pretending together with you. 

Its useless after all... She wun be reading this anyway. How i wish she would be able to hack into my account, use my account and hack into this blog and read it...

Maybe i shall just use it to vent my anger on huh...
~
June 30, 2007


Trust

Im wondering...

What are people trying to say when they constantly keep throwing hidden messages in their message? One example is "Stop lying. Im just merely lying together with you" thats wad i OFTEN use and its OFTEN true and is OFTEN aiming at someone. May it be someone i like, or someone i hate. My main blog have a number of entries i mentioned about all these stuffs... Its pretty much useless anyway. No one seems to understand.

Today she finally takes action. I doubt anyone will have their eyes sharp enough to see the little small removal of something in my main blog. Not the test dou. What is her hidden action? And the hidden meaning? I realised I can no longer trust her the way i used to. This is so much the same to so many people. Good thing, in poly, I managed to regain many... BUT... i have a question... Even in their actions, are they true about what they are doing? Or did they make me regain the trust of them so that they can make more use of me?

I hope i can regain the trust i have of her. She do have similar problems with me. And i believe that.
~
June 24, 2007


Pizza

Went to granny house today... In the past i like to go there alot. Now i dun... All because of that CHINA WOMEN... Sorry to say, but im quite a racist.

Actually she is ok... But it seems like no one in my family likes her. With a exception to some la...

Today i saw her, and she was wearing like... so horrendously TRANSPARENT that i can actually see through her clothes... Very clearly summaw!!

Den during dinner time... Everone was lazy to go downstairs to tapau... so... we ended up calling Pizzahut home delivery. Its a long time since i had it. VERY long time.

It was nice....
~
July 12, 2007


China

The title tells it all...

China is a very fast developing country indeed... but the people are getting more and more arrogant. I hate them...

They declare themselves as a clean country. But just look at the daily newspaper... its almost guaranteed that there will be at least 1 news article the will bring down the reputation of China.
~
January 18, 2008


Kocky

Kocky! Thats the word. AHH...
its a meaningless word. dun bother to check the dictionary..
Even if u check, it means, DICE... in Spanish.
Thats y i say its meaningless. Bahx.
Anyway... a warning...
This entry 
CONTAINS RACIAL CRITICISMS...
Dun bother to read if u will feel angered easily.
Especially if u r from China.
Bewarned. If u got angered, dun blame me.
For I had already warned u.

Recently i saw many stupid people... May it be in NUS, in bus or even walking home or just getting downstairs to take a look at the lockers... I shall just list 2.

I was in the bus, im sure everyone in Singapore would know ALL local public buses have NO seatbelts right? fancy this women came to take a seat in front of me, looking for a seatbelt... She even ask the person beside her where is it... This man beside her eventually give him a stupid look...

There was this lady in the bus stop... this bus stop have steps... When she suddenly missed the step and almost fell, she gave a very loud scream... So loud that it shocked all the people in the bus stop... den she continued to curse that darned step that almost make her fell until even my bus arrives...

Somehow somehow somehow... out of these 10 11 stupid people, 9 10 of them bear identical nationality... So to that China women who said that all Singaporeans are stupid, its seems to me that china people (I shan't say Chinese) are even worse off... Yes... those 9 10 of them are from CHINA.
The problem seriously lies in them manx...
Read the news... One china women came to Singapore to open a chicken shop. What if a Singaporean open another chicken shop there? Think of it, what will be the difference? No.. I would say... What if a china people reads this entry? and put it another way.. What is the difference?? Its the truth anyway...
~
May 9, 2008


Broken...

I am working tomorrow...
Comparing to the past when I am still having my attachment, my working environment has been altered so much, and I hate it.

During the times during attachment, probably I am still not experienced there, I did not see any darkness within. Until when I switched part-time, many of my bosses and managers are then, slowly revealing their true colours. In front of us, they are always putting up a show as if they wanted us to stay. But behind us, they are actually the masterminds to hope that you will leave as soon as possible, all because of a reason, money.

But still, I cannot lose my job this way.

Why am I living in such a cruel world? My family's job are breaking up. My dad, lost his job, because his contract has ended. My mum, have to torment by fears of the canteen closing down anytime. If strictly speaking, my sister is the only breadwinner. She handles the monthly bills that is forever hiking as time goes by, and is the only one holding a proper job. Now, even me, cannot hold on to a proper part-time job.

Could this be a reason why are the rich getting richer while the poor are getting poorer? And yet, the stupid government are still saying that Singaporean's standard of living has increased this and that. Can't they see its actually the COST of living that is constantly increasing but NOT the standard? They are encouraging citizens to work till old age, then why on earth they are constantly welcoming and encouraging foreigners to work in Singapore? Employers, for obvious reasons, will choose the foreigners of course, for they are younger, faster, more efficient than old people. Well, tell me, how is it ever possible for families to grow when more and more foreigners are taking away our jobs everyday? Singaporeans losing their job, their family's breaking apart, while outsiders are draining our source of income away...

It is so unfair.

And yet, it is never possible for me to show my true feelings. I am forced to fake a smile.
Who knows if you show your true feelings, the people will take it as if you fake it out, in seeking help from the society?
~
May 10, 2008


I don't understand

I don't understand...

Why does it whenever I turned on my computer,
it will always be assumed that I was playing games?
Even when I am studying or working online?
Even when I showed and explained?
Even when I clearly wasn't even at my computer?

Im seriously wondering
~
May 10, 2008


Nothingness

Nothingness...
Today I showed my friend some of the stuffs, in the end...
What I got are those I was already expecting.

So why bother?
Sometimes it is the best to remain silent.
~
May 15, 2008


Hope

Struggled myself to work today.
It was raining so heavily.
And the wind was so strong and cold.
And yet my stomach have been feels like it has been punched hard.
The weather which I suppose to enjoy turns out something to make me struggle more.
My stomach had been giving me problems for the past 24 hours.
Since last night.
Yet, I still have to work.
My colleague needs me to help him with some work.
I cannot say no right?
Probably it is because of the drink I had the day before.
My colleagues who had the same icy drink as me also have the same fate as me.
Just that they are less serious.
Maybe it is also because of the cheesy stuffs and mint drops I got yesterday.
Will I feel better tomorrow?
I hope.

---------------------------------------------------

Sometimes it is not the outside world that you feared most.
Sometimes it is the inside that will make you suffer.
Today my mum broke a piece of bad news to me.
Why are they doing so?
Whats ending will end eventually.
Whats coming will still come in the end.
Next week shall decide the fate.
How I am going to decide how they will be will be on next week.
Will they be cruel enough to push us into the lake?
Or will they be kind enough to keep us up?
I have no idea.
The tough unfairness will soon be gone.
But could it turn out to be a blessing in disguise?
I hope.

---------------------------------------------------

I found out something today.
All my efforts gone to waste.
Disappointed.
It is not the first time.
Isn't it amazing that I can stay perfectly calm when I am suppose to flew into a rage?
This is so not me.
Maybe I should take a look at the good side.
Maybe you will be happier that way.
Maybe your family will feel better that way.
Maybe that thing is not worthy after all.
Maybe.
I hope.

Sorry, but I do not feel good today.
~
May 16, 2008


亂...

在我現在的世界裡...
真的真的只可以以那一個字型容...

現在的我
都不知道我還喜歡不喜歡上班...
都不知道我還喜歡不喜歡玩樂...
都不知道我還喜歡不喜歡吃喝...
都不知道我還喜歡不喜歡努力...
都不知道我還喜歡不喜歡聊天...

我不知道為何我突然感到好累...
我不知道為何我突然感到無聊...
我不知道為何我突然感到無奈...

這幾天
出現了一連串的屁尿屎的怪事...
可是我又什麼都無能為力...
可是我又什麼都幫不上忙...
又加上身體不舒服...
真是雪上加霜...

今天
我跟我表妹聊了一下下...
沒有想到她本身也有一大堆亂七八糟的大小事情...
我們就這樣又說又笑的聊...

可是
我手機偏偏不給我面子...
在我們聊到一半突然沒了電磁...
就在我到家再次連絡到她時...
她那邊又發生了一件事...
她叔叔去世了...
~
May 20, 2008


要不要?

我有一個問題.
如果人家問了你一些要不要的問題,你因為選擇了不要而被罵,你會怎樣?

有時真搞不懂一些人的想法.
明明問了我要不要,但卻不讓我選擇要或不要.

如果我不可以選擇要或不要, 就不要問我要不要好嗎??
~
June 7, 2008


流言

你可以不要那麼直接嗎...
每次看到你在 My World 的流言我都不知道該什麼耶...
我很多事後都會把它刪掉...
但是有時又怕你因為這樣而不高興...
請你多多為所有人想想吧...
不要亂亂流言好嗎...
~
June 29, 2008


有人問我...
為什麼我突然很少上網...
我以前都不是一天24小時都在MSN的嗎...

對啊...
我以前的確時很喜歡上網和朋友聊天...
幾乎天天都可以看到我...
可是我現在不但很少上網聊天...
我根本就非常討厭登陸MSN...

不是因為我不喜歡和朋友聊天...
也不是因為我不喜歡我朋友...
而是...
我想我其實是正在逃避一些事實吧...

我是個男人耶...
我真沒用...
~
July 14, 2008


Zzz...

如果你公司來了一個天天日日夜夜嘰嘰咂咂嘰嘰咂咂的老說話个不停的新同事...
你會怎樣...

如果你公司來了一個天天日日夜夜樣樣都必須要你完成的新同事...
你會怎樣...

如果你公司來了一個天天日日夜夜通通都要管通通都要快通通都要好的新同事...
你會怎樣...

我的媽呀...
救救我吧...
~
July 16, 2008


*Headache*

Sometimes I think i am giving in too much.
Sometimes I think u are being too arrogant.

Sigh...
~
August 8, 2008


Overwhelmed... Part 1.1?

Feeling so overwhelmed...
You can considered today to be my last day of work in NCS NUS bahx?

Somehow this should be a happy event,
but not only am i NOT feeling so, i felt so overwhelmed...
and I am not letting many people to know that i had left...
我不要讓那些不該知道的人知道...
免得個個開始不停的來烦我...

Well...
After all,
Its like I had been working here for like almost a year.
And it is the longest time I been in a company.
I would miss many many things...
All the gossips, all the laughters...

How come this feeling is so much stronger than graduating in NP??

~~~

My last day rain came abit too early this time round~~
Has the curse been broken?
~
August 8, 2008


Overwhelmed... Part 1.2?

My family tree are breaking up!!!
Troubled...
My uncle, recently kept calling my mum and some others for money.
Serve him right!
He is a hopeless gambler.
He is the one who borrows money from loan sharks.
He is the one who sold my grandma's house.
He is the one who made my grandma homeless.
He is the one who married a China women who later ran off with another guy.

But but but...
Why do I feel that he is very 可憐 ne?
He is my uncle after all...
Why does my mum avoid his calls?
Why is it that no one are seeing his better sides?
Why is that no one are helping him?

He got scolded for giving free meals for kids.
He got scolded for chatting with his friends.
He got scolded for almost everything...

Wanted to say this out to my mum...
But... Will they think the same way as me?
I seriously doubt so...

Just now my mum told me something about him...
It only makes me feel worse.
~
August 8, 2008


Overwhelmed... Part 1.3?

How offensive can the below word or sentence or whatever you call it be?

"Hey!"

I seriously dun understand why on earth and how the hell can that be considered offensive...
Just because i used the exclamation mark??
Later on...
I also came to realise that this is also considered to be too...

"HAHAHAHA"

Just because its in CAPS?
And when I ask further...

"la la la la~~~"

Is considered to be too... Its because I used the word "la"...
I dun understand... Serious...
Its weird.
Its just too... weird...
And... weird.

If those 3 things are considered to be offensive,
how many people have I scolded now?
~
August 30, 2008


我累了...
如果我又做了一些傻事你們會怎樣??









不過在怎麼樣你們都可以放心啦... 我會沒事的...
~
September 15, 2008


拜托

拜託...
你們不要對我太好啦...
因為這樣會讓我跟加依依不捨...

我爸為了我去求了一個護身符...
讓我平安...
我舅為了我帶我去吃好料...
讓我開心...
我姐為了我跟我說了一大堆笑話...
讓我哈哈大笑...
我媽為了我帶我去廟拜拜...
讓我心安...
我妹為了我幫我做了很多事...
讓我不會那麼煩躁...
我友為了我給了很多很多祝福...
讓我深深感動...

好啦...
我很高興擁有像你們這樣的家人朋友...
謝謝哦...
~
October 4, 2008


*

Somehow, sometime, someway, somewhat...
Life? Its as good or as bad as it can be.
Im so tired.

Freedom? Whats that?
We were told to take initiative in things and yet we are told not to do anything without permission.
Conflicting. Contradicting.
Whatever they say is a command. Whatever we say is an excuse.

Murmur goes on...
I hate it.

Physically? Mentally?
Mentally is more like it.
Life without him?
Its a bliss.

Somehow... I have the same feeling.
~
November 29, 2008


10 dec

Left with just a few days... countable with hands if you exclude weekends...
so fast... so fast...

Gosh... even though ive been saying i cant wait to leave this place...
I think im going to miss this place.

Even the commander i hate the most seems so nice now...

10 December 2008.
~
April 4, 2009


我啊...
現在就天天天天都過著一個亂亂亂亂七八糟糟糟糟的日子裡...

有時...
一睡醒就是吃, 吃飽就睡, 睡醒又吃, 吃了又不醒人事...
又有時...
一睡醒就是忙忙忙忙忙忙到連吃飯睡覺的時間都沒有...
然後有時...
連想要好好地躺在舒舒服服的床上或好好的坐下來都不能...
然後又有時...
當我不想休息的時候我又莫名其妙地非得休息不可...

而且...
我又得天天過這醍心跳膽的日子...
天天時時刻刻都必須為突如其來的是做好準備...
樣樣事情都要快快快快...

我不喜歡現在的生活...
我不喜歡現在的人生...
我不喜歡現在的自己...

也就因為這樣...
我發現我不在帶有我以前常有的笑容...
我發現我不在帶有我以前常有的力量...
我發現我不在帶有我以前常有的快樂...

樂觀都變成了悲觀...
歡笑都變成了哭泣...
力量都變成了脆弱...

現在...
我每個禮拜都只能盼望週末的到來...
好能讓我好好的小小休息一下...

在一生中...
我們知道了多少, 我們就也會跟著它, 變得跟痛苦...
不是嗎?

我好累... 好累... 好累...

我好希望會有一個平平靜靜的日子...
我好希望會有一個平平淡淡的生活...
我好希望會有一個簡簡單單的日子...
我好希望會有一個安安靜靜的日子...

我只想要回去我以前...
那種消遙自在地世界裡...
~
June 2, 2009


Things are not what it seems

我開心嗎?

其實很多事情並不是你所看到的哪麼平靜...
我, 也並不是你們所看到哪麼開心...

太多的不愉快, 不舒服, 不喜歡.
太多的納悶, 吵鬧, 分離.

我所做的事為什麼你們都看不到?
然後就在別人的背後說一大堆有的沒的疯涼話...
啞巴吃黃蓮...
睜眼說瞎話...

算了...
先在這個世界我想也只會越變越亂吧...
一點都不公平...
~
February 6, 2010


好久不見

哇...
好久不見!!!

你變了許多...
現在我想問你...

你要怎麼用啊?????
~
January 3, 2011


2011!

哇... 又一年過去啦!!!
2011... 突然我什麼也不想要太多, 也不會去要求很多...
但我只希望所有認識我的人, 包裹我家人, 都能身體永遠健康...
當然還有你喔...


健康就是福...
不是嗎?

新年快樂!

2011...
對我來說...
是個特別的一年...



一定要靠自己
加油...
~

Love the fact I can literally copy and paste the entire entry here according to how it is in wretch!
Please, blogger, don't leave me.
Out.